Verse of the Day
BaptistTop1000.com - Top Baptist Websites
(May be more than one verse)
September 18, 2018
Gray Text Box
Proverbs 18:19: "A brother [or other relative, friend, associate, etc.] [who has been] offended [hurt, or sinned against] is harder to be won [won over, won back, reached] than a strong [walled-in, fortified] city [which is almost impossible to conquer]: and their [the offended person's] contentions [arguments, quarrels, disputes] are like the bars of a castle [or fort, military stronghold, etc.--meaning they're thick, strong, and impenetrable]."

Offending people causes resentment, which is very hard to overcome.

In paragraph 6 of his commentary on this verse, Pastor Jim Delany of Salem Bible Church says, "It is EASY to offend a brother or a friend…" because it can occur:

" … through carelessness with our words
   … through maliciousness with our words
   … as a misunderstanding
   … by means of a third party sticking their nose in someone else's business
   … because we only heard one side of the story
   … when the one offended is overly sensitive or thin skinned
   … when the one who offends is callous or insensitive
   … because of something said in jest; it was a joke, but they took it seriously
   … when you are obeying God and rebuking sin
   … when we say things in anger that we would never say otherwise
   … when for one reason or another, the allegiance is no longer there… or the allegiance is given to someone or something else"

Regarding Solomon's reference to a "strong city" in the above verse, Pastor Delany says, in paragraph 8 of his commentary, that:

"c. An offended brother builds walls around himself to keep the offender OUT… when he feels attacked by the offender."

"e. Those walls are a kind of defense mechanism because the offended party doesn't want to be hurt again."

"g. Once those walls are built, they are extremely hard to penetrate."

Fighting frequently occurs within families (e.g., husbands and wives don't communicate with one another and are separated by an invisible wall, or parents go on for years not speaking to their children, and vice versa) and even between families, friends, neighbors, etc. One example cited in the commentary is the feud between the Hatfields and McCoys, which began with a fight over a hog.

Pastor Delany says we should try our best to avoid offending people in the first place, but if it happens anyway, this is what we should do about it:

-- If we have offended someone, we should apologize to him or her, and confess that sin to God.

-- If someone has offended us, we should tell the person that we feel hurt and should hope for an apology and reconciliation.

The commentary (in paragraph 8c) ends with the following advice:

"Whichever side of those iron bars you find yourself… RESTORING the relationship ought to be paramount.
"• A little bit of grace and humility goes a long way!
"•  Solomon says that winning back that person is difficult.
"• But that doesn't mean we shouldn't try. Nothing is too hard for the Lord."

If you want to read the rest of the commentary, here's the link: https://www.salembible.org/proverbs-index/proverbs-18-index/proverbs-18_19/.



Gray Text Box
Proverbs 18:19: "A brother [or other relative, friend, associate, etc.] [who has been] offended [hurt, or sinned against] is harder to be won [won over, won back, reached] than a strong [walled-in, fortified] city [which is almost impossible to conquer]: and their [the offended person's] contentions [arguments, quarrels, disputes] are like the bars of a castle [or fort, military stronghold, etc.--meaning they're thick, strong, and impenetrable]."

Offending people causes resentment, which is very hard to overcome.

In paragraph 6 of his commentary on this verse, Pastor Jim Delany of Salem Bible Church says, "It is EASY to offend a brother or a friend…" because it can occur:

" … through carelessness with our words
   … through maliciousness with our words
   … as a misunderstanding
   … by means of a third party sticking their nose in someone else's business
   … because we only heard one side of the story
   … when the one offended is overly sensitive or thin skinned
   … when the one who offends is callous or insensitive
   … because of something said in jest; it was a joke, but they took it seriously
   … when you are obeying God and rebuking sin
   … when we say things in anger that we would never say otherwise
   … when for one reason or another, the allegiance is no longer there… or the allegiance is given to someone or something else"

Regarding Solomon's reference to a "strong city" in the above verse, Pastor Delany says, in paragraph 8 of his commentary, that:

"c. An offended brother builds walls around himself to keep the offender OUT… when he feels attacked by the offender."

"e. Those walls are a kind of defense mechanism because the offended party doesn't want to be hurt again."

"g. Once those walls are built, they are extremely hard to penetrate."

Fighting frequently occurs within families (e.g., husbands and wives don't communicate with one another and are separated by an invisible wall, or parents go on for years not speaking to their children, and vice versa) and even between families, friends, neighbors, etc. One example cited in the commentary is the feud between the Hatfields and McCoys, which began with a fight over a hog.

Pastor Delany says we should try our best to avoid offending people in the first place, but if it happens anyway, this is what we should do about it:

-- If we have offended someone, we should apologize to him or her, and confess that sin to God.

-- If someone has offended us, we should tell the person that we feel hurt and should hope for an apology and reconciliation.

The commentary (in paragraph 8c) ends with the following advice:

"Whichever side of those iron bars you find yourself… RESTORING the relationship ought to be paramount.
"• A little bit of grace and humility goes a long way!
"•  Solomon says that winning back that person is difficult.
"• But that doesn't mean we shouldn't try. Nothing is too hard for the Lord."

If you want to read the rest of the commentary, here's the link: https://www.salembible.org/proverbs-index/proverbs-18-index/proverbs-18_19/.



BaptistTop1000.com - Top Baptist Websites
Note: In case you're wondering, before adding my comments in brackets
to the above verse(s), I usually refer to commentaries by Adam Clarke,
Albert Barnes, John Gill, and Matthew Henry (which can be found online)
and try to summarize what they say. For verses from Proverbs, I also refer
to the Bible study notes written by Jim Delany, pastor of Salem
Bible Church. Word definitions are taken from online
dictionaries (including Bible dictionaries).


*  *  *  *  *

Note: The book of Proverbs has 31 chapters and is full of wisdom.
It's been suggested in the past that Christians should get in the habit
of reading one chapter from Proverbs each day, corresponding to
the date of the month. I think it's a great idea and have decided
to follow that advice. The chapter for today is posted below:


Proverbs Chapter 18
1 Through desire a man, having separated himself, seeketh and intermeddleth with all wisdom.
2 A fool hath no delight in understanding, but that his heart may discover itself.
3 When the wicked cometh, then cometh also contempt, and with ignominy reproach.
4 The words of a man's mouth are as deep waters, and the wellspring of wisdom as a flowing brook.
5 It is not good to accept the person of the wicked, to overthrow the righteous in judgment.
6 A fool's lips enter into contention, and his mouth calleth for strokes.
7 A fool's mouth is his destruction, and his lips are the snare of his soul.
8 The words of a talebearer are as wounds, and they go down into the innermost parts of the belly.
9 He also that is slothful in his work is brother to him that is a great waster.
10 The name of the LORD is a strong tower: the righteous runneth into it, and is safe.
11 The rich man's wealth is his strong city, and as an high wall in his own conceit.
12 Before destruction the heart of man is haughty, and before honour is humility.
13 He that answereth a matter before he heareth it, it is folly and shame unto him.
14 The spirit of a man will sustain his infirmity; but a wounded spirit who can bear?
15 The heart of the prudent getteth knowledge; and the ear of the wise seeketh knowledge.
16 A man's gift maketh room for him, and bringeth him before great men.
17 He that is first in his own cause seemeth just; but his neighbour cometh and searcheth him.
18 The lot causeth contentions to cease, and parteth between the mighty.
19 A brother offended is harder to be won than a strong city: and their contentions are like the bars of a castle.
20 A man's belly shall be satisfied with the fruit of his mouth; and with the increase of his lips shall he be filled.
21 Death and life are in the power of the tongue: and they that love it shall eat the fruit thereof.
22 Whoso findeth a wife findeth a good thing, and obtaineth favour of the LORD.
23 The poor useth entreaties; but the rich answereth roughly.
24 A man that hath friends must shew himself friendly: and there is a friend that sticketh closer than a brother.



Note: In case you're wondering, before adding my comments in brackets to the above verse(s),
I usually refer to commentaries by Adam Clarke, Albert Barnes, John Gill, and Matthew Henry
(which can be found online) and try to summarize what they say. For verses from Proverbs,
I also refer to the Bible study notes written by Jim Delany, pastor of Salem Bible Church.
Word definitions are taken from online dictionaries (including Bible dictionaries).


*  *  *  *  *

Note: The book of Proverbs has 31 chapters and is full of wisdom.
It's been suggested in the past that Christians should get in the habit
of reading one chapter from Proverbs each day, corresponding to
the date of the month. I think it's a great idea and have decided
to follow that advice. The chapter for today is posted below:


Proverbs Chapter 18

1 Through desire a man, having separated himself, seeketh and intermeddleth with all wisdom.
2 A fool hath no delight in understanding, but that his heart may discover itself.
3 When the wicked cometh, then cometh also contempt, and with ignominy reproach.
4 The words of a man's mouth are as deep waters, and the wellspring of wisdom as a flowing brook.
5 It is not good to accept the person of the wicked, to overthrow the righteous in judgment.
6 A fool's lips enter into contention, and his mouth calleth for strokes.
7 A fool's mouth is his destruction, and his lips are the snare of his soul.
8 The words of a talebearer are as wounds, and they go down into the innermost parts of the belly.
9 He also that is slothful in his work is brother to him that is a great waster.
10 The name of the LORD is a strong tower: the righteous runneth into it, and is safe.
11 The rich man's wealth is his strong city, and as an high wall in his own conceit.
12 Before destruction the heart of man is haughty, and before honour is humility.
13 He that answereth a matter before he heareth it, it is folly and shame unto him.
14 The spirit of a man will sustain his infirmity; but a wounded spirit who can bear?
15 The heart of the prudent getteth knowledge; and the ear of the wise seeketh knowledge.
16 A man's gift maketh room for him, and bringeth him before great men.
17 He that is first in his own cause seemeth just; but his neighbour cometh and searcheth him.
18 The lot causeth contentions to cease, and parteth between the mighty.
19 A brother offended is harder to be won than a strong city: and their contentions are like the bars of a castle.
20 A man's belly shall be satisfied with the fruit of his mouth; and with the increase of his lips shall he be filled.
21 Death and life are in the power of the tongue: and they that love it shall eat the fruit thereof.
22 Whoso findeth a wife findeth a good thing, and obtaineth favour of the LORD.
23 The poor useth entreaties; but the rich answereth roughly.
24 A man that hath friends must shew himself friendly: and there is a friend that sticketh closer than a brother.